The Star Wars Holiday Special

Director: Steve Binder

Writers: Pat Proft, Leonard Ripps, Bruce Vilanch, Rod Warren, Mltzie Welch

Stars: Mickey Morton, Paul Gale, Patty Maloney, Art Carney

Runtime: 1h 37m

MPAA: TV-PG

Released: November 17, 1978

The Star Wars Holiday Special may well be the most infamous television special that has ever aired. It has been reviled by critics, fans, and many involved with the project itself. This includes George Lucas who has claimed he would destroy every copy of it that existed if he could.

The reluctance of the star cast members from Star Wars to appear in the Holiday Special is clear to see. Harrison Ford performs as though he’s been held hostage and compelled to act against his will. Mark Hamill puts in a bit more effort but is still quite obviously phoning it in. Carrie Fisher meanwhile appears to have taken a hefty amount of substances to help her through the ordeal.

Similarly the writing team seems to have been on something when creating this unfortunate piece of television history. After ten minutes or so of wookie dialogue that contains no subtitles the special moves through a barrage of disconnected skits that baffle the mind. There’s madness inducing dance sequences, poor comedy bits, and even a lustful serenade performed for the elderly wookie Itchy.

Horrid music choices are made around every corner. The fantastic tracks pulled from John William’s original score of Star Wars are fine, but each new song is awful. There’s a song which sounds like a soundtrack for a demented Cirque du Soleil that’s designed to torture. There’s a rather uninspired guest appearance by Jefferson Starship who do “Light the Sky on Fire”. There’s even an unfortunate song performed by Carrie Fisher during which everyone seems ready to leave. Worst of all is a “This Minute Now” from Diahann Carroll which appears as fulfills some uncomfortable fantasies of Itchy.

Despite the horrid writing the actors who play Chewbacca’s family give their best. They are the main characters of this story. Mickey Morton is Malla, the wife of Chewie. Paul Gale is grandad Itchy, and Patty Maloney is the son of Malla and Chewie. They eagerly await the return of Chewbacca for life day. It is mostly their home life we see as Chewie and Han Solo escape close calls with imperial forces.

Also providing talent to this special are the television personalities of Art Carney, Harvey Norman, and Bea Arthur. They seem to be actually trying as well, and manage to provide a handful of jokes that land. There’s also a sea of jokes that miss entirely, mostly during some of the ridiculous sketches they are made to take part in. Bea Arthur also has a song to sing. She performs “Good Night, But Not Goodbye” over the Cantina Band song and actually may be the best performance of all the songs.

The best part of the Holiday Special by far is the animated sequence that introduces Boba Fett. Its animation style is rather strange, but it manages to provide an interesting short story. This is over quickly however before it goes back to the terribleness that is three wookies speaking intelligibly to each other. By the end of the entire program Boba Fett proves to be the most interesting character despite his few minutes on screen.

It is thanks to some of these brief moments that the Star Wars Holiday Special is saved from being a complete disaster. Yes it is very bad, terrible even, but there are very small nuggets of goodness within the madness. Every Star Wars fan should see this fever dream like special some point in their lives, even as much as George Lucas understandably wishes he could stop it.

★☆☆☆☆